


Drinks

by MrProphet



Series: The Wowbagger Archive [1]
Category: Confessions of Dorian Gray, Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-22
Updated: 2017-04-22
Packaged: 2018-10-22 13:44:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 308
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10698234
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MrProphet/pseuds/MrProphet





	Drinks

"It's the eternity of these Sunday afternoons that gets to me," the visitor sighed. "What time is it?"

"A quarter past nine," Dorian replied. "In the morning. And it's Tuesday."

The visitor sighed. "Still?"

Dorian sipped his brandy to hide a smile. "I'm afraid so."

The visitor drew on a Cuban cigar and looked at it as though it were a cheap mentholated cigarette. "There comes a time where you've pretty much done everything there is to do," he went on. "Don't you find?"

"Not yet."

"I won't say that I envy you, because I got over that a few thousand years ago. I'd pity you the eventual realisation that the tedium of immortality can only be staved off by immorality for so long, but I can hardly muster that anymore." He knocked back the last of his whiskey and creme de menthe - an odd choice, but he had insisted that he hadn't tried it before; his verdict was 'not revolting enough to be truly new' - and stood.

"You won't stay?" Dorian sounded hurt, although in reality his emotion was closer to the irritation of a child denied a new toy. "Perhaps I could suggest a few new experiences."

The visitor laughed a little bitterly. "The arrogance of youth. Thank you for the drink." He walked away, his robes swishing the floor behind him, but at the door he stopped and turned. "Oh, and Dorian Gray?"

"Yes?"

"You're a self-absorbed, arrogant twat whose pointless hedonistic quest for self-validation in the degradation of others only highlights your adolescent inability to form complex and lasting relationships. I just thought you should know that."

Dorian was literally stunned for a moment, and while he did rouse himself before the door swung closed, he never found: "Well, Wowbagger is a stupid name," to be a riposte worthy of recording in his memoirs.


End file.
